Holy Cougartown, Batman!

I don't know much about Justin Bieber. Nor should I, as he is 16 years old, and the newest tween sensation. Then he goes on freaking Jimmy Fallon with his windswept Zac Efron-y hair and plays the drums like he came out of the womb doing it. WTF? Alright teen girls of America. I wasn't drinking the Bieber-ade, but daaaaaaaamn. You gotta give credit where credit is due. And that kid is CUTE. He's like the Jonathan Taylor Thomas of 2010. And that's saying something.

Now, before you get all judgey and call me a creepy cougar, I have a few things to say.

1. I'm far too young to be a cougar at 26. If anything I'm like a mangy alley cat.
2. I'm beginning to think these boys are getting more talented and media savvy. Back in my tween heyday, it was rare if ever you saw a tween heartthrob on network TV. Clearly the PR people wised up on that front.
3. Have you seen Taylor Lautner??? Sweet Mother of God I'm pretty sure the movie "New Moon" was shot around his abs. That's not even a joke. Yeah, I saw that movie. No, I'm not proud of it. But it was like lady porn every time he came on the screen because he was ridiculously ripped and was essentially making lovey eyes at Kristin Stewart the whole movie. Good news, though, that kid is at least 18. Whewf.

And you know what? Frankly, I don't want to be judged for my teen heartthrob celebrity crushes. For God's sake, Maxim magazine has uber-creepy countdowns for girls turning 18 and nobody says anything. I remember when they did it for Mary Kate and Ashley Olson, which in hindsight is particularly disturbing...So me getting slightly googly-eyed over Taylor and Justin is just no big deal. Especially since while I think they are really cute, you throw in Johnny Depp or Leo DiCaprio and I'm out on the junior varsity. Your talent is attractive, boys, but I'll take chest hair and flossed teeth any day.

High Five.